Midway

Rampage may be unique among videogame franchises in that, across six titles and twenty years, not a single one of them has ever actually been a good game. No, Rampage has squeaked by on the strength of its premise alone.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Violence

Game Description: Rampage: Total Destruction offers a fresh take on an arcade classic complete with everyone's favorite monsters. Control George, Lizzie, and Ralph as they go around the world, destoying major cities through direct destruction or through their fighting. Virtually everything in the environment can be damaged, broken, and utterly destroyed with plenty of hilarious results. Aided by power-ups, the Rampage: Total Destruction monsters will acquire upgrades throughout the course of a single campaign—leading to even more destruction.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood, Intense Violence, Strong Language

At what point does hyperbole become falsehood? I know that most discerning consumers have long since decided to take everything that ad copy claims with a grain of salt, but isn't there a bare minimum standard of honesty that these things should be held to?

Game Description: Area 51 is a great aracde shooter that's bringing its action and challenge home to you. You'll lead a special unit into the famous Area 51 and discover just what's really lurking in that mytserious, classified desert base. An infectious mutagen has given players alien-enhanced physical abilities but is slowly transforming them into an alien. They must find the cure before it's too late and their humanity is lost. Face off against a horde of horrific creatures and secure Area 51!

Apparently the good people at Midway noticed that there was a genre going unrepresented on the video game store shelves: the Evil God Simulator. To fill this void, they offer PsiOps: The Mindgate Conspiracy. It may not have been intended as an Evil God sim, but that's certainly how it plays, and I for one am ecstatic that it does.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Strong Language, Intense Violence, Blood and Gore

Game Description: Psi-Ops: The Mindgate Conspiracy sets a new twist on the stealth genre by emphasizing psychic powers as a means to achieve objectives in addition to the use of weapons and agility. Cast in the role of American Psi-Operative Nick Geller, you must make use of telekinesis, pyrokinesis, remote viewing, mind draining, aura seeing, and mind control to stop a deadly and dastardly band of terrorists., The player's mind becomes the ultimate weapon in a game where stealth action and psychic abilities combine to create the ultimate special operative.

Game Description: Open-ended kart-like airplane racer with a strong focus on humor, over 13 different characters, and 9 stages from exotic islands to roaring Chicago., Take to the skies for some of the goofiest cartoon-style racing ever. Choose from a list of 13 broad characters, then see what kind of damage you can do on a total of 10 tracks including 1920s Chicago, a spooky graveyard, and a pirate town. In addition to the stiff competition, you’ll have to contend with obstacles like leaping sharks and angry gangsters. With dialogue created by the writers of The Tick, an awesome soundtrack, and lots of hidden tricks, this one’s full of laughs, challenges, and adrenaline-pumping excitement.