THQ

According to ESRB, this game contains: Mild Language, Violence

It's not entirely fair to review a game and compare it with the things that came after it, but let's face it, anyone who reads this and gives Warhammer a shot is inevitably going to be playing it in the wake of the big three FPS games. Life is cruel, and no one ever said it was fair.

I suspect that there is no genre more rigidly formulaic than Real Time Strategy (RTS) games. Now, this can be said of almost any genre, but the interesting thing about RTS games is how similar the specific actions that the game is made up of are. Start a level with no troops. Build a base. Gather resources. Build a bigger base. Build an army. Crush your enemy with an overwhelming attack. Repeat for the next fifteen years.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood, Violence

The hardest games to review are the middle of the road titles. Talking about terrible games is just fun, and the biggest challenge when dealing with great games is finding twenty different words to replace 'great'. Then there are the titles that are just sort of there. Completely by-the-numbers productions that don't do anything particularly wrong, but don't stand out in any way either. If there's nothing to push against, nothing to think about, what is there to write about?

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Language

Game Description: Based on the blockbuster hit film starring Keanu Reeves, in Constantine gamers will take on the role of John Constantine in an intense third-person action-horror videogame. Throughout the game, players will encounter terrifying enemies which were all recreated from the movie using original source materials as well as new enemies designed exclusively for the video game. Constantine's "true-sight" ability will help the gamer distinguish friend from foe as they identify half-breed demons and unearth demonic secrets. As the gamer moves between the planes of Earth and "Hell LA", they will discover that one world affects the other, creating original gameplay scenarios over 14 levels.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Strong Language

If you love the Evil Dead films, you will enjoy this game. If you don't get giddy every time someone says "say hello to my boomstick," then you're probably better off just skipping this game and the review.

I'm not sure why Dan put on the kid gloves when it came to his final words on The Punisher, but calling it an extremely well-designed action game is an overstatement. Action game, yes. Well-designed? No.