Ha ha, not bad Zippy! Not sure what 'learning disabled' means, but you sure have a great vocabulary.
It's pretty breathless (not a bad thing) and is an entertaining read. At the same time, it probably needs a bit more structure and focus to make it more accessible. It's quite fun though. Hopefully you're enjoying working on this project.
if one listened between the pitter patter of the rain and the quite thunder in the distance you could hear the wrinkles forming on his brow
..this made me smile