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Old 12-31-2008, 03:42 PM   #4
Jason Karney
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Re: Prince of Persia Review


This is a good piece of writing. I agree with Brad, that you make your points well, without going into bullet points or minutia about how things work. (It sounds like you don't want to have to revisit the game that closely! ) Unlike Brad, I think the length is about right for the review.

You stuck with our site format, which is good if you're interested in being published on our homepage. For the subtitle I would suggest the slightly altered "Beauty plunged in darkness" which makes slightly more sense than "purged," at least to me. One thing you'd need to add is a rating, __ out of 10 after the review text.

Generally, all this would need is some basic editing to be published; the usual polish that we all go through. Except maybe Brad, who has a golden pen. I would focus especially on the three paragraphs leading up to the end, starting with combat through to Elika. The verbiage is pretty good, but feels rough there. Maybe segue from combat to Elika, and finally how all that combines with the repetition to make the game non-challenging for you. (Like I said, you've got good points, just needs a little bit of polish.)

Great job, I hope we see more from you!

Last edited by Jason Karney; 12-31-2008 at 03:47 PM.
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