Mistwalker

Spoiler Alert: This article contains spoilers for The Last Story.

The best-regarded cinematic games of today owe much of their structure to the currently-derided Japanese role-playing game. For all that players heaped scorn on the running-in-tubes gameplay of Final Fantasy XIII, it shared with the Uncharted games the feature that the player's task was to kill his way from one cutscene to the next.

The Man, or the Pauldron?

HIGH Watching Zael finally tell off the Earl.

LOW Watching is all I got.

WTF Is there anybody in this game who didn't lose their parents during childhood?

Released in 2006-07 as an Xbox 360 exclusive, probably with the goal of helping establish the console in Japan, Blue Dragon has inexplicably spawned sequels and a minor multimedia empire. It's reasonably fun, if you like turn-based role-playing games, but Blue Dragon is clearly a bad game.

The crew reunites and wastes no time getting back to doing what they do best: angering the Internet with a brutal dismantling of Bastion. Plus: Sexism in Ms. 'Splosion Man, the failures of L.A. Noire, the joys of Ghost Recon 3DS, and the magnificence of Lost Odyssey. We also debut our new movie segment, and if you like surprises, well, hold onto your wigs and keys, folks. Featuring Chi Kong Lui, Brad Gallaway, Mike Bracken, and Tim "Fresh Beatz" Spaeth.

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Links:

• Ms. 'Splosion Man Review
• L.A. Noire Review
• Bastion Review

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Game Description: Blue Dragon is an epic role-playing game that centers on a young boy named Shu and several of his friends. These unlikely heroes possess the power to control phantom shadows that mirror the actions of their masters, giving Shu and his comrades miraculous strength and magical powers. The warriors can create and develop their combat styles by utilizing different types of Shadow Change, including Sword, Assassin, and Power Magic. Shu and his friends must use the shadows as weapons and wield their skills to save their world from impending doom. Encountering various people on a planet where numerous ancient ruins remain, the characters and their shadows travel through a world full of mysteries and illusions, where the slightest touch can cause reactions of unparalleled magnitude.