Online/Multiplayer

This one time, me and my friend Keith...

HIGH: Barreling through all four survivors with the charger.

LOW: Rochelle's extremely bland character.

WTF: Why can't the tank pick people up like the charger does?

As first-person shooter campaigns go, it's definitely in the 95th percentile of enjoyable shooting galleries. But it's also a campaign that worries me. While playing through the brief solo mode (roughly five hours), I couldn't help but be reminded of the stereotypical Bay film: Things blow up, uber-macho soldiers shout, the player performs wild stunts (like jumping into a helicopter for the umpteenth time), and loud orchestral music plays. It doesn't seem to matter that the plot is poorly paced, makes very little sense, and no characters are developed. If I'm a typical M-rated gamer, all I'm supposed to care about is that I shot people and stuff blew up real purty.

In my review of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, I disagree with my peers that the game is not a compelling example for games as art, rather it's perfect for a sports argument. Take 36-year-old David Dague of Chicago. When interviewed by The Associated Press, he said the game's launch is like the start of football season for a sports fan, and the comparison couldn't be more fitting. But there's another, more obvious landmark the game reaches in the form of its controversial level, "No Russian."

Above And Beyond The Call Of At Least One Duty

HIGH Covering a human player with AC-130 armory.

LOW A hole-ridden plot that ends in obvious sequel bait.

WTF Tactical nuke?!

Empty calories

HIGH Holding both princesses for the last few seconds while the entire enemy team is running wild in the castle.

LOW The sudden realization that almost every match plays out the same way.

WTF The sudden realization that almost every match plays out the same way.

Team Fortress 2's "classless" update dropped recently, adding the new King of the Hill game mode, several new maps and some pretty significant class changes (despite being classless), the most prominent of which are the return of the Scout's double jump while using the Sandman (at the expense of 30 health) and allowing the Engineer to repair one end of a teleporter (including removing Spy sappers) by repairing the other.

Cute, but deadly

HIGH "All of Tera's towns are so impressed they're giving money!"

LOW Being one space away from a doorway and spinning a two. Then a four. Then a six.

WTF The walking undead should not make me go "Awww!" and want to pinch their cheeks.